Second guy whom i locked my eyes on.

Third week of school! Kind of depressed, stress and frustrated thinking about it. Time flies too fast and i still haven't get the outcome of my appeal. This really really fucking sucks big time. I hate them, terribly. Paid so much yet i get this kind of service. All i can do is wait and wait. Its like waiting for the sun to drop, which is impossible. School has been good but i am not enjoying it cause it wasn't what i wanted. I have no idea what i am going to do if im really given this path. I shall wait for the outcome and see how it goes. JUST GIVE ME THE BLOODY APPEAL!!! Sorry.

Oh i have always been wanting to see him in school. And i finally got to see him last saturday during his break. Kind of get caught off by it, unprepared. So frantic, blushing and nervous. Well its my first anyway, that explains. But after that, i don't feel like seeing him anymore. I feel like forgetting him but i can't. But i am quite sure my feelings for him kind of subsided. Saw him the second time, but this time he didn't saw me. Cause i ran away from him. Spare me the awkwardness. But like my friend say, i should be brave and just walk past him. I will do it next time i get the chance. I'll let him know what he is losing. Now i know he is in the same class as my friends. Imagine i didn't change course, i will be seeing for another 6mths. Frankly speaking, i love my old course, not because of him. I don't even intend to change if it wasn't due to one of my modules.

Talking about him, i am in the same class as his friends. This sucks. During the first lesson, his friends saw me and just gave me this (O.O) big eyes stare. I was like what the heck?! I simply just ignore and sat. But i must say it is really pure coincidence. And so they begin to sit behind or 2 rows behind me on every lesson. I am quite sure they might mention about me to him though. Maybe?

I moved on to another guy. The guy whom i met in ntuc. He is working there on every sunday but i have no idea if he is working as part time or full time. He definitely looks like a student, thats for sure. But imagine if he is working there forever, i would definitely forget about him. I always go grocery shopping with my parents on sunday morning. So we kind of recognise each other by then. Last sunday i decided to be brave and steal a glance at him. I have no idea how the hell he know where i am standing. He just tilt his head up and look at me. So he caught me looking at him, i was so nervous that i decided to look away. However, we turn and look into each other's eyes the second time. This time, our eyes was locked for a few secs. Eye contact i must say. After that i looked away due to shyness. Mum asked me to ask the counter if the ham is chicken or pork. I heard his friend says "shes coming." I was too shy so i didnt ask him for help. Ended up my mum embarrassed me infront of them by saying out loud "why are you so shy? you like him? He's handsome?" I can't help it but to shy away from embarrassment. Seriously i hated my mum for that, at that moment. I am so sure he did heard that and i saw him tilting his head down, arranging the meats. In the end my dad went up to ask him. Nice speaking english he had. And mum never gave up. She asked me to buy chicken ham from them. Luckily he was serving other customers. So i grabbed the chance to ask his friend instead. He went to the loo and after im done, he was back. Kind of long scenario but yet funny. I must say i definitely leave a deep impression on him, so did he. I wonder whats his name, what is he doing and most importantly, is he single?

Everybody ask me how does he look like. Whenever i say he do wear black frame specs too. All their expression is the same. Shocking. Well, i can't help but admit i do like black frame specs boys, but it depends cause not all. But i must say the first time i saw him, i did look closely if he was that first guy. Abit of resemblance but sharper features. Face condition is the same. No curly hairs but flat. My liking of guys are kind of weird huh? Coming to the end of the week and im going to see him again. I wonder what will he do. Shy away from me or smile at me? I am not going to approach any guys from now on. Once bitten, twice shy. Or should i say twice hurt? And yes i did. I hope he won't be the third guy whos gonna hurt me. I am so sick of these. Growing to lose faith on guys. But of course, i don't want to stay single for my entire life. Just waiting for the right one.

Loves,
Kate